


Moments

by AOBZ



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, like a second of angst, reference to marital rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-07
Updated: 2016-02-14
Packaged: 2018-05-18 16:50:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5935699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AOBZ/pseuds/AOBZ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fluffy one shots about our favourite OTP finally coming together. All chapters are from the same universe, but the timeline is random and jumpy. </p><p>Ch 1: Regina and Emma finally admit their feelings towards one another (super cute)!<br/>Ch 2: Mary Margaret is finally told why her daughter and her lover despise her new baby name.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“Come on, Regina. You agreed to at least try it. It’ll be fun, you’ll see.”

“I fail to see the appeal, miss Swan.”

Emma rolled her eyes. Regina liked using that nickname when she was annoyed, skeptical, feeling playful, or in this case, unimpressed. Emma disregarded the reply and skated to the opening in the rink’s boards, holding out her hand. She could see the apprehension on Regina’s face now that they were in close proximity, so she gave her a comforting smile.

“No one will see you while you learn to skate. And I promise not to let you fall, okay?”

“I don’t know why I let you talk me into these things,” Regina finally said, reluctantly taking Emma’s hand.

“Because I’m cute, and you can’t say no to me.”

Regina snorted.

“Yes, that must be it.”

Emma grinned at her and took her other hand, helping her onto the ice. Regina’s legs braced and she began to wobble, so Emma wrapped her arm around her lower back. She brought the woman to the side of the rink and pointed to the boards.

“Grab the edge. Okay, now I’m going to hold onto your other hand and you’re going to glide forward like I showed you at the house, okay?”

“Alright.”

Regina had no idea why she had given into this ridiculous activity. She had no interest in learning to skate. If Emma hadn’t looked so damn excited to show her how to, she would never have found herself in this predicament. Damn the woman and her puppy dog eyes.

“Okay, you can move forward.”

Regina pulled herself from her thoughts and moved her right foot forward a little unsurely, gripping the edge of the boards as she attempted to move. She had refused to practise in front of Emma at the house because she felt ridiculous “gliding” her feet along the floor while pretending to ice skate. She had not been above locking herself in the bathroom afterwards though and doing as Emma had shown her.

Regina repeated the movement with her left foot, unable to help the smile as she moved forward a few more inches on the ice.

“Awesome! You’re a natural!”

“I’ve moved a foot. That’s hardly impressive,” she responded, but she was secretly pleased with herself.

“Yeah, but you did it without falling. Try again.”

Regina did, her legs locking as she slid along the ice. They moved at a snail’s pace at first, but Emma’s patience was infinite. She continued to encourage her, even when Regina became exasperated with her lack of progress.

“You’re not going to be doing spins in the air after twenty minutes on the rink, Regina. You’ve gotta slowly work up to it, but you’re doing great. Come on, let’s do this little bend and then you’re back to skating straight again.”

Regina sighed and did as she was told.

“I know it’s a slow process, but I really think you’ll be happy once you can skate on your own. I think you’ll enjoy this. It’s freeing.”

“Yes well, I dislike the amount of energy it is taking to do something so seemingly trite.”

Emma paused, her confidence wavering slightly.

“Do you really not like this? We don’t have to continue. I just thought, you know, it could be something fun for us to do.”

The vulnerability in Emma’s eyes softened Regina’s expression.

“No. I am enjoying myself. I just…” she glanced away before admitting the truth. “I very much dislike that you are seeing me while I am still learning. I would prefer if you were not witness to my ignorance.”

“Hey, it’s not ignorance. It’s just… inexperience.”

Regina raised an eyebrow.

“That is the same thing.”

“Ignorance sounds so negative. You’re just learning; it’s okay. I won’t tell anyone that you fell on your ass.”

“I most certainly did not,” Regina said, appalled.

“Exactly why I won’t tell everyone that you did.”

Regina blinked, turning her head so Emma would not see the grin on her face. She’d been had, and she could tell by Emma’s smile that she was proud of herself.

“Come on. I’ll race you to the end.”

Regina rolled her eyes and shooed her away.

“Go. I’m going to attempt to skate on my own this time.”

“Okay, but it’s not my fault now if you fall.”

Emma turned and skated away, stopping when she was at the furthest end of the outdoor skating rink. She then spun to face the other way, looking at the immense expanse of ice before her. It was late, nearly 10, so the place was deserted. She had planned it purposefully, knowing that Regina would refuse the activity if there were others watching. The woman in question was doing her best not to show that she was gripping the edge of the boards as though her life depended on it, moving at a snail’s pace along the edge of the rink. In Emma’s opinion, she could probably let go and move on her own, at least for a few feet, but she knew Regina would not let go just yet. The woman hated to fail, or in this case fall, and Emma knew that she would not break her hold of the boards until she was positive that she could skate on her own.

“Are you going to skate or stand there staring at me all night?”

Emma grinned at Regina and pushed off the side, gliding her feet forward. She began doing laps, slowly at first before pushing herself harder, speeding up until she felt like she was soaring. She closed her eyes briefly, spreading her arms and grinning madly.

Regina watched from the side, unable to tear away from the sight of Emma looking so liberated. The blonde hid her demons well, but the weight that she carried was ever present. Emma’s shoulders were always heavy with the weight of her past, her regrets, her guilt, the expectations of others. It was a rare sight to see her looking so free, and Regina found she could not look away. Emma skated backwards, forward, intermittently closing her eyes, but the one thing that never changed was the broad grin on her face.

“Come on, Regina. Skate with me!”

The brunette blinked and shook her head.

“I am not letting go of this wall.”

“Come on! I won’t let you fall, I promise. And I’ll go really slow.”

Regina made another move to protest, but Emma caught her free hand and squeezed it gently.

“Please?”

 _Damn her._ Regina could not resist that look. It was the same one their son gave her when he wanted something he knew he was not allowed. They just looked so damned hopeful that she couldn't say no. Since she could not deny the woman, Regina settled on glaring at her instead.

“If I fall, Emma Swan, I swear-”

“You won’t, I promise!”

Regina sighed and gently let go, her hand shaking (though she would never admit it) as she took Emma’s other hand. A sudden wave of panic hit her but Emma had anticipated it, so she distracted her with a smile.

“There you go. See? You’re doing awesome. You let go and you’re still standing. Now, to move forward, it’s the same as when you were holding onto the wall. Glide your foot like you did earlier but brace yourself on my arms.”

Emma tensed her arms, letting them become a solid point for Regina to hold onto as she attempted gliding for the first time without the safety of the boards. Emma could not help the grin on her face as Regina began successfully gliding forward (Emma moved backwards as Regina moved forward so as to stay out of her way). She was incredibly proud of the way Regina was so easily moving along the ice.

“Why are you grinning so widely, miss Swan?”

“I’m proud of you! I feel like a parent teaching their kid to walk.”

Regina rolled her eyes, but she felt a small spark of something she wouldn’t acknowledge upon hearing that Emma was proud of her. Not that she cared. Or wanted her approval.

Regina moved forward carefully, watching her feet as she did. The silence between them continued for several minutes until Regina finally spoke, still looking at her feet.

“Where did you learn to skate anyway?”

“I taught myself. One of the families I was with didn’t really have much, but they had skates. They were two sizes too big so I stuffed the ends with extra socks and went to the outdoor skating rink at night and practised until I got good enough to skate like I do now.”

“It didn’t bother you that other people watched as you attempted to learn?” she asked, finally looking up at Emma.

“I went late at night, after everyone went to sleep.”

Regina hid her frown, as she often had to do when Emma opened up about her childhood.

“How old were you?”

“Eight, I think. It was with the Donalds.”

“You went out at night, unsupervised, at the age of eight?”

Emma shrugged.

“It wasn’t so bad. It was a nice neighbourhood and the Donalds were decent. They had their own kids, so they didn’t care what I did as long as I didn’t cause problems. I didn’t hate staying with them ‘cause I got to do my own thing and they didn’t bother me.”

Regina didn’t realise how hard she’d been squeezing Emma’s hands, not until the woman squeezed back. She loosened her grip and forced herself to nod, despite the anger and guilt she felt inside.

“It wasn’t all bad, Regina, how I grew up. I learnt to survive and how to take care of myself. I don’t need other people to take care of my problems. If I had grown up with my parents, I’d be a whiny little shit. There’s no way you and I would ever get along if Mary Margaret had raised me.”

Regina snorted.

“That’s for certain.”

“And I wouldn’t be able to impress you with my sweet moves either,” Emma joked, shaking her hips as she continued to skate backwards.

“Yes, sheriff. Your agility knows no bounds.”

Emma laughed. She loved when Regina sassed her.

“Okay, now that we’re at the end of the rink, I’m going to turn around and we’re gonna skate to the other end, but we’re gonna go fast. I want you to close your eyes, okay?”

“Emma…” Regina said apprehensively.

“I won’t let you fall. Trust me.”

Regina looked at her, still hesitant. Emma held her gaze and nodded assuredly.

“Okay?”

Regina took a deep breath before nodding slowly.

“You won’t regret it. Are you ready?”

“I suppose I haven’t a choice.”

Emma ignored the comment and moved slightly forward, gripping Regina at the elbows and encouraging her to do the same. When their arms were locked, Emma felt a flutter of excitement.

“Okay, here we go. Close your eyes.”

Regina held her breath as she was pulled forward, slowly at first, then marginally faster. She could feel herself being turned and pulled, skating in a straight line and then in an S pattern. Emma glided them along smoothly, never faltering in her movements. The longer they skated, the more Regina’s confidence in Emma grew. She was loathe to admit it, but Emma was right. This was fun. She could feel the wind blowing her hair, and she enjoyed the coolness on her cheeks. She liked the way she felt as she was pulled around; it was a feeling unlike any other. She let Emma guide them around two more times before becoming comfortable enough to speak up.

“You can go faster if you'd like.”

Emma bit her bottom lip gleefully. She did as she was told, carefully bringing up their speed until they were flying around the rink. She could feel Regina’s tension ease the longer they skated, until the woman was smiling wholeheartedly. It was so rare that Emma got to see Regina like this: genuinely happy. She was usually so carefully guarded, and the only time she ever opened up was when it was just the two of them. It had been a long, slow process to earn Regina’s trust, but the more time went by, the more she got to see these hidden parts of her. These shared moments were becoming almost commonplace now that the two were spending so much time together. With no big bads in town and Henry old enough to stay alone (or to babysit as he was now doing), the two women had free time, something that they had been sorely lacking just a couple of years ago.

It had all begun with taking walks together, getting coffee in the morning at Granny’s diner, sharing the occasional lunch at Regina’s office. That had naturally progressed to what they shared now: a strong friendship that resulted in their spending most nights together, with or without the presence of their son.

Regina wobbled suddenly and her eyes shot open, fear written all over her face. Emma righted her immediately, smiling at her. Regina held her gaze, staring at her as her heart continued to beat rapidly in her chest. It was in moments like these, when Emma held her so innocently, smiled so genuinely, letting Regina see through all of her defenses, that her heart clenched with an emotion she dared not admit. Regina saw what was so clearly plastered on the other woman’s face, what they had not yet acknowledged. The knowledge of what was there began to taunt her, reminding her of what she was not worthy of having. Regina started to shake her head and tried to stop, but she didn’t know how. She could feel herself starting to hyperventilate when she realised she was trapped on the ice.

“Regina?” Emma asked, immediately noticing the change in the other woman. She slowed them before asking what was wrong.

“Enough, Emma. Stop. I have to get out of here. Let me go!”

“Okay, okay. Come on.”

Emma let go of one elbow and guided Regina to the opening in the boards. Regina jumped onto the snow and practically ran to the bench, dropping down onto it and ripping at the laces on her skates. Emma watched from the side, immensely confused as to what just happened. She tried to stay away to give the woman a moment. However, as she watched Regina rip off her gloves and struggle to untie the laces on her skates and failing miserably, she finally acted.

Emma ripped at the laces on her own skates, loosening them and walking over. She yanked off her skates and shoved her feet in her boots, ignoring the discomfort of her distorted socks and bunched up pants. She then knelt before Regina, gently taking the woman’s shaking hands and moving them away from the laces she was attempting to undo.

“I don’t need your help,” Regina snapped.

“I know, Regina,” Emma replied calmly. “I’m just going to take these off. Can you pass me your boots?”

If she had said that she was going to help her, Regina immediately would have pushed her away. Instead, Emma phrased her response in such a way that she hoped Regina would comply. Luckily, Regina did, reaching over to grab the boots and handing them over. Emma thanked her and then took her time undoing the laces on her skates, picking apart what could have possibly happened on the ice for Regina to freak out the way that she did. She wasn't sure.

Emma knew Regina had panicked once she realised that she was unable to get herself off the ice, just as she was once unable to free herself from her mother’s abusive grip as a child, but something had caused her to go from carefree to terrified just before that panic set in and Emma couldn't figure out what it was.

Emma slipped off the skate and smoothed out Regina’s socks (she wore two pair for warmth) before sliding her foot into her boot and tucking in her pant leg. She then moved to the other skate, worrying her bottom lip as she desperately tried to figure out what she had done wrong. Had Regina gotten scared? The smile on her face hadn’t made it seem like she was scared. Had she started to feel trapped by Emma’s hold on her? But her body had been loose, not tense. Emma hadn’t said anything stupid to upset her. Had she just stopped having fun?

Emma racked her brain as she adjusted the socks on Regina's other foot, still taking her time to give herself time to think, as well give Regina a chance to calm down. When she had finally put on the other boot, she was no closer to figuring out what happened. She stayed kneeling at Regina’s feet, massaging the back of her left calf in an attempt to keep her from fleeing.

“Please tell me what happened.”

Regina looked down at the woman who had so lovingly put on her boots. Emma was staring at her with fear and confusion in her eyes, as well as that ever present emotion that Regina could never escape, not when Emma was around. She looked so genuinely concerned that it tore at Regina’s heart.

But she couldn’t. She couldn't do this. Regina shook her head and got up, needing to get away. She fled, her instincts screaming at her to escape. In every single situation, Regina's instinct was to fight. Except when it came to this. 

She could not do this, not with Emma, not with anyone. Regina was independent. She had finally gotten herself to a point in her life where she was comfortable, almost safe. People still disliked her, but they didn’t hate her as they once did. She had even made a friend in Ruby, the woman confiding that she had never truly hated her for casting the curse because it had given her relief from her own curse for nearly 30 years. She had Henry, who provided her with the opportunity to express the love she had hidden deep in her heart. Contrary to the rumours, Regina did feel a great deal of love and affection, but events in her life and made those emotions lie dormant for decades. That is until Henry had come into her life, reminding her what it was to love again.

She loved her son, but that love was different, it was not like the one she had felt when she was young, naïve, and innocent. That love had stayed hidden, protected, and no one, _no one_ , had been the recipient of that kind of love after Daniel. And no one was supposed to either, but as much as she had fought it, as much as she had denied it, that damned irritatingly loving, loyal, persistent, gentle woman had wedged her way into the part of Regina’s heart that she had squared away from everyone. And with the emotions so clearly reflected Emma's eyes as she knelt before her, Regina could not cope. She was terrified. Maybe it made her a coward, but she knew she couldn’t do this again. She could not survive that kind of loss for a second time.

So Regina ran. Because it was too hard to deny herself what she so desperately wanted from Emma, what she felt she did not deserve. Emma, however, would not let her go. She never let Regina run and she was not about to start now.

Emma raced up to her, reaching out and grabbing Regina's arm to prevent her from getting away.

“Regina. Stop. What’s going on? What happened?” Emma stared at her until their gazes met. “It’s just us, okay?” She then gentled her tone further, “It’s just me, okay? It’s just me. Please tell me what happened. I don’t know what’s going on.”

Regina could feel the tears burning behind her eyes, Emma’s caring tone cutting her like a knife. She tried. She’d been trying. She had been semi-successful at keeping things platonic, at maintaining nothing but friendship between them. But every outing, every shared coffee, every innocent caress weakened her. Every smile Emma shot her way, every squeeze of her hand when Regina hurt, every thoughtful gesture just secured the hold that Emma already had on her heart. It was getting harder, more painful, to keep the status quo. She couldn’t stay away from the intoxicating blonde and the truth was, she didn’t want to, but to let their friendship become something more... Regina couldn't do that. Emma reminded her of what a loving relationship was like, even if they weren’t in one, and it _terrified_ her. So despite the fact that she longed for more, Regina fought her emotions, her feelings, and she pretended like she was happy with things the way they were.

Emma took a step forward, sliding her hand up to cup Regina’s cheek. It had finally clicked. She knew what was going on now. As soon as she her brain had caught up to what happening, she kicked herself for not cluing in earlier. Emma knew what had been building between them for months now, but Regina had needed time, so she hadn’t pushed. She had backed off, but these moments between them, these looks they exchanged, they were becoming more and more frequent. She had been waiting patiently, and while they had come close a couple of times, Regina always pulled away. She had never run though, and Emma was not about to allow that.  Regina was deserving of love, even if the woman was scared of it. Even if she felt she didn’t deserve it. Emma had been waiting, but maybe it was time to try something new. Maybe it was time to acknowledge it, so she took a step forward into Regina’s personal space.

“Tell me,” she murmured, stroking her thumb along Regina’s cheek.

Regina looked away and let the tears quietly fall. She shook her head.

“I can’t,” she croaked.

“Yes, you can, Regina. You can do anything. You’re the strongest, bravest woman I know. You can do this.”

Regina closed her eyes and leaned into the warm hand, fresh tears falling into Emma's palm.

“I’m not strong enough for this, Emma.”

Emma leaned forward and pressed her lips to her forehead. A sob hitched in Regina’s throat when she felt warm lips against her skin. She fought it, but when Emma wrapped her arms around her, she broke down.

“It’s okay, honey. I know. Shh,” Emma soothed, kissing her temple and stroking her back. “I know, Regina. As long as you need, I’ll wait for you. But I know.”

Regina gripped her jacket tight, shaking her head.

“I can’t. I can’t.”

Emma held her lower back firmly with her left arm, her right coming up to once again cup Regina’s cheek. She tilted her head so that they were looking into each other’s eyes, and Emma at her.

“You are beautiful, Regina. Everything about you, I love. I love the way you take care of our son. I love that you’re a strong, independent woman. I love that you know exactly what I want for lunch. I love that you kick me in the ass when I’m being mopey. I love that you are so demanding and that you get bitchy for no reason sometimes. I love how resilient you are. I love that you don’t take shit from anyone. I love that I can get you smiling even when I’ve pissed you off. I love how snarky you are and I love that you sass me at every given opportunity. I love that you know how to take the stains out of my jeans. I love that you give into me because I know that I’m the only person, aside from Henry, whom you would _ever_ give into. I love that I now know the proper time to use “whom” because you spent twenty minutes explaining to me the difference between who and whom. I love that I can surprise you like I just did by admitting that I listened to your grammar lesson. I _always_ listen when you talk, Regina. Do you know why?”

“Don’t, Emma,” Regina whispered as she looked away, but there was no strength behind her words.

Instead of listening to the woman in her arms, Emma smiled at her.

“Look at me.”

Regina hesitated, but when she finally did, Emma spoke confidently.

“Because I love you, Regina Mills. I love you with everything I have, with everything that I am. I’m going nowhere, and when you’re finally ready, I will be right there waiting for you, like always. I will never leave, Regina. Because I love you.”

The conviction in her voice, the sincerity in it, made Regina lose the battle with her tears once again. She looked a mess, but the love and safety Emma offered to her made her momentarily forget the rigid rules she had created for herself so many years ago. She had lived by the rules to not show her true feelings, to remain at a distance from everyone. It was safer, and if it had been anyone else, she’d have pushed them away and she’d have been successful in hiding her true feelings. But she wasn’t with anyone else. She was with Emma. _Her_ Emma. And her Emma had just said the most beautiful things to her, things that Regina had never thought anyone would ever say to her. Not after who she had been, after all the things that she had done. So she fought her instincts to run, she ignored the voices in her head telling her that she didn’t deserve this, and she looked at Emma. Emma, who was her safe place, her constant, her best friend. She looked at her, and she forced herself to believe her, to trust in her.

“You’re such a brave woman, Regina.”

“I don’t feel very brave right now,” she confessed softly.

“I can be brave for the both of us until you remember that you’re actually the strong one.”

Regina gave a small, mirthless chuckle.

“I’m not being very strong right now.”

“Even the strongest person has their moments of weakness. Sometimes you just need someone to remind you of what you’ve temporarily forgotten. Just don’t run from this, okay? I believe in you and I believe in us. I can wait, but I need you to promise you won’t run.”

“This isn’t going to be easy, Emma. I’m not… I’m not an easy person to love.”

“I’ve never liked easy, Regina. I like a challenge, and I know we will be a challenge. But loving you? That’s always been easy.”

Regina swallowed. She refused to cry again. She was not this emotional.

“Damn you and your romantic Charming genes. I am not this sappy,” she mock glared.

Emma grinned widely.

“You can’t resist a Charming. You can try but sooner or later...”

Regina stayed quiet. She could not refute that. She had tried. She had tried so hard.

“Okay?” Emma finally prodded.

Regina took a deep breath.

“This is going to change everything.”

“What’s it gonna change, Regina? We already spend basically every minute we can together. We share a son. I practically live at your house. We grocery shop together. You do my laundry. I shovel your driveway. When my mother is looking for me, she texts you because she knows I’m with you and you’re way more reliable for responding. She already thinks something is going on, and I’m pretty sure my dad does too.”

Regina gave a small smile.

“Ruby does as well,” she confessed.

“See? And they’re cool with it. Nothing’s gonna change except for the fact that now I can finally tell you how I feel about you.” Emma paused before adding with a grin, “And I’ll get to kiss you.”

“Oh you will, will you?”

Emma nodded, her mood lightening now that Regina was starting to come around.

“And is that something you’ve wanted to do?”

“More than you know. I think about it all the time.”

“You do?” Regina asked playfully.

“Hell yeah. I’m thinking about it right now, actually.”

Regina paused for a second, before taking a deep breath.

“And suddenly you’ve decided to stop acting on your impulses? How very unlike-”

Emma immediately moved forward and pressed her lips to Regina’s. She cupped her cheeks, tilting her head and pressing their lips more firmly together. When she heard the other woman’s whimper, Emma’s stomach tightened. It was the single most erotic sound she had ever heard, and she was determined to hear it again. She moved her right hand to cup the back of Regina’s neck, holding her in place as she kissed her more firmly. She waited until Regina pressed her body forward to open her mouth and slide her tongue along the woman’s lips. Emma was immediately granted access, and when their tongues met, she was rewarded with a groan from the brunette. God, if she was this vocal just kissing, Emma wondered what noises she’d make if (when?) they actually became intimate. She could feel the wetness pooling between her thighs at the combination of Regina’s tongue in her mouth and the thought of said tongue in other sensitive places.

Regina pulled back and panted against Emma’s lips. She waited half a second before wrapping her arms around her neck and pulling her closer, pressing their lips together once again. It was Emma’s turn to moan, her nipples tightening painfully at the way Regina aggressively kissed her. _This_ was more like her Regina, and truth be told, Emma loved the way the woman was taking possession of her lips. They kissed, pulled apart to breathe, and resumed kissing again until Regina finally broke away.

“We should continue this at home.”

Emma smiled widely, nodding in agreement.

“So are you… you’re okay?”

“Yes, Emma. Thank you. I-” Regina faltered, taking a second to reflect. “I’m- I’m scared,” she finally admitted. “I have not done this for a very long time and the first time, it… it ended…” she trailed off, unable to continue.

“I know, honey. It’s not going to be easy for you, I know that. But I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. I love you Regina Mills, and we are in this together, okay?”

Regina nodded. It was difficult to be so dependent on Emma to help her, when she was used to doing everything on her own. But, she trusted her, and she had to admit that it was high time she finally allowed someone in.

“Can I go back for the skates or are you gonna take off on me?”

Regina rolled her eyes and pushed Emma one-handed towards the skates.

“Go before I come to my senses and find someone less annoying to love.”

Emma made a move but stopped dead in her tracks at the last word.

“What?” Emma asked, grinning.

“Nothing. I said to get the skates.”

“No. No you left off with something else there, your Majesty.”

“You’re mistaken, peasant. Fetch me my skates.”

Emma took a step towards her, wrapping her arms around Regina’s waist and trapping her in her embrace.

“Say it.”

“I will say nothing.”

“Say it or I’ll make you regret it.”

“I would like to see you try.”

Emma leaned forward and began kissing along Regina's cheek, working to her neck and gently nipping at it with her teeth. She held her close as she dug her fingers into her sides, causing Regina to laugh and attempt to pull away.

“Enough, Emma!”

“Admit it,” she mumbled against her skin.

“I will admit nothing.”

Regina wiggled in her arms, laughing as Emma began blowing raspberries against the side of her throat. They tumbled back onto a pile of soft snow, Emma refusing to let up.

“Say it,” she repeated, kissing her nose.

Regina settled back, enjoying the weight of Emma’s body above her despite the cold. She looked up at the woman and smiled.

“I told you it wasn’t going to be easy,” Regina said with a grin.

“And I told you I like a challenge. Now say it before I tell everyone how many times you fell on your ass. It’s going to be incredibly embarrassing, the way you couldn’t get up once you were down, begging me to help, whining-”

“I love you.”

“and how your skates kept-” Emma’s heart stopped and she blinked, staring, lips parted as the words played over in her mind.

“I love you, Emma Swan.”

It was Emma’s turn to fight off the tears. She leaned forward and kissed Regina fully, only pulling away long enough to speak one last time.

“I love you too, Regina Mills.”

 

 -Fin

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is another one shot from the same universe as the previous chapter. It is set after Emma and Regina have been together for some time.

“The appointment went smoothly. Everything is good and the baby is growing normally. He’s going to be a strong, healthy baby.”

Emma nodded at her father, piling more mashed potatoes onto her plate. Her parents were now expecting their second child, and while it wasn’t her favourite topic to discuss, she indulged their excitement.

“We bought the baby his first gift to celebrate the good news!” Mary Margaret gushed excitedly.

“Mary Margaret,” David said warningly.

Her father’s tone set Emma on edge. She eyed her mother carefully, slamming her fork down when she saw the woman pull out a plaque, carved with the name she had chosen for the baby. This had been a fight they had been having for two months now, and she was getting sick of it.

“I told you never to bring that name up around us.”

“Emma, you are going to have to get over this ridiculous aversion you have to my father’s name. What has gotten into you? I’ve told you the baby’s name is Leopold and you are going to have to get over whatever problem you have with it.”

Even her girlfriend’s normally soothing touch did not calm her down. Emma felt Regina's hand rub her thigh, despite her own stiffened posture at seeing the name in painted baby blue.

“We are _not_ having this discussion at the dinner table. Put that away.” 

“I thought you’d be excited about the good news. Why are you-”

“Excited? You thought I’d be _excited_ to hear you repeat that you’re still going with naming your baby after a ra-”

“Emma!” Regina, now pulled from her state of silence, cut her off before she could say anything else.

“What?” Emma said, turning to her girlfriend. “It’s true! She wants to name my baby brother after that-”

“ _Enough_ , Emma,” Regina snapped. “This is not the time.”

“Emma?” Mary Margaret looked over at her. She never understood her daughter’s aversion to her grandfather. She reacted angrily, almost violently so, whenever his name was brought up. She hadn’t even know the man, yet whenever Mary Margaret tried to talk about him, Emma would react as though she despised him. Ever since they had found out the baby was a boy and she had announced the baby’s name, Emma had been vehemently arguing with her against it. She wouldn’t listen to reason, tossing seething comments at Snow any time she tried to talk about it.

“This is bullshit, Regina. You cannot sit there and tell me that this isn’t going to be a problem. She can’t keep this up. She can’t name the kid after him.”

“It’s not our business,” Regina said calmly, hiding the fact that her insides were in knots. “And watch your language. There are children present.”

Emma shook her head and jumped up from her seat. She balled up her napkin and threw it on the table.

“You can fake it if you want. You can all sit here and pretend like that man wasn’t the scum of the God damn Earth and that it’s okay to name an innocent baby after him, but I won’t. I am not going to act like this is okay!”

Emma was shaking with anger. How dare her mother bring this up _again_? Every time it came up in conversation, Emma felt her rage boil even more than the time before. How dare Mary Margaret name an innocent kid after the man who spent an entire decade doing heinous things to his wife? She wanted to _honour_ her father? The man was a disgusting excuse for a human being and there was no way Emma would stand by and pretend like it was okay to pass on his name to her brother.  

“Henry, take Neal into the other room, please.”

Upon hearing his birth mother’s deathly calm voice, the boy did exactly as he was told. He knew that voice. There was a storm brewing and he was more than happy to get out of the way. As soon as she heard Henry lead Neal upstairs, Emma spoke again.

“You are not doing this. You can’t seriously be doing this, Dad. Please tell me this is not happening.”

“It was tradition in the old world to name children after the people who were important to you,” he explained gently. “Had the baby been a girl, we would have called her Eva after your grandmother. But since it’s a boy, we will call him Leopold after your grandfather.”

Emma shook her head, her stomach in knots. She felt physically ill. Mary Margaret had tried to force conversations about her grandfather in the past, talking about what a wonderful father he was. She never got very far before Emma shot her down. She was _not_ going to sit back and listen to her talk about the man who had tortured her lover, her best friend, for over a decade. She fucking _loathed_ that man and if she ever got the displeasure of meeting him, through some kind of magical event or mishap, she would murder him. After she had extracted her own revenge on him that is.  

“I can’t do this.”

Emma practically ran from the room. If she did not leave now, she would scream the thoughts currently rolling around in her head. She would not betray Regina that way though, so she bit her tongue and stormed out of the house, slamming the front door as she did. Regina had forced her into promising never to discuss the things they spoke about. They had had long disagreements about it (Emma wanting to confront her mother, while Regina vehemently refused) and ultimately Emma had backed off. It was not her secret to tell, no matter how much she believed it should be exposed. Mary Margaret had to suspect anyway. She had to know, at least deep down, that her father had forced himself onto Regina, along with subjecting her to countless other atrocities while they were married. Regina had been an 18 year old child who had been forced into marrying a man three times her age. Anyone with half a brain cell would have been capable of deducing what had ultimately occurred.

Emma fumed as she left the house, biting her cheek, focusing on the pain so as to keep herself from turning around and raging after her mother for being so God damn ignorant. It didn’t matter though, because the very woman rushed after her and caught up with her before Emma had even gotten the chance to fully leave the driveway.

“Emma! Stop! I’m sick of this! I can’t ever talk about my father without you losing your temper. What is going on with you? You didn’t even know him. He was a good man! How can you hate him so much?”

“Really, Mary Margaret? Really? You don’t know? You have never taken a second to even think about what he has done to Regina?!”

“Emma!” Regina shouted, grabbing Emma’s arm and cutting her off. She knew her girlfriend would not be able to keep her impulsive mouth quiet for long, so she had run after mother and daughter. The last thing she needed was for all of her dirty laundry to be aired out for the entire world to hear.

“What did you tell her?” Mary Margaret said accusingly. “What did you say about him? I know you hated him, but that gives you no excuse to speak so poorly of him. He was a good man.”

“I’m walking away now, Regina. You need to let me go. I need a break because I am going to talk if I don’t.”

Regina, knowing how hot tempered and impulsive her lover was, simply nodded.

“I know,” she said softly.

Emma took a step towards her, taking a deep breath to calm herself temporarily.

“I know it’s not my decision, but you need to stop protecting her,” Emma said, stroking Regina’s cheek. “There are too many secrets in this family. They need to come out.”

Regina stayed quiet, so Emma just nodded.

“Okay,” Emma said gently. “I love you.”

With a final kiss on the corner of her girlfriend’s mouth, Emma turned and walked away, disappearing around the block.

“What is she talking about, Regina? Who are you protecting?”

Regina took a deep breath before turning to her former stepdaughter.

“You, Snow,” she replied with a sigh.

Regina walked away and re-entered the house, making her way to the dining room and starting to clear up the table. Regina felt her irritation grow when the younger woman followed her inside, immediately pestering her with questions. Mary Margaret had been temporarily stunned by the use of her old name (Regina never used it anymore), but she quickly recovered and ran inside the house to demand more questions.

“How are you protecting me? When have you ever protected me? What do you think you’re protecting me from? I’m an adult now, Regina. I can protect myself.”

Regina ignored her, snorting internally at the thought that Mary Margaret could protect herself from _anything_. She was just as helpless now as she was as a child. Instead of responding, Regina piled dishes in her hands and went into the kitchen to load them into the dishwasher.

“Regina. Answer me.” When she saw that she was being ignored, Mary Margaret tried again more firmly. “Regina!”

“No. I do not owe you anything, Mary Margaret. You will not order me around in my own home.”

“You owe me when it comes to my daughter! She is usually such a sweet person, but she turns into this ugly ball of anger anytime my father’s name comes up. I haven’t told her anything about him. I haven’t been able to, because she jumps down my throat every time I try. Why did you poison him in her mind? You knew what he meant to me!”

“Which is why she hasn’t told you the truth,” Emma said evenly.

“Emma,” Mary Margaret said, confused. “I thought you left.”

“I did,” she responded to her mother’s comment, but she was speaking to Regina. “But I came back. I realised I was leaving you alone during a shitty conversation and that isn’t fair. I’m sorry for blowing up. We know I have impulse control issues and sometimes I react badly. I got as far as the end of the street before I realised I was leaving you to deal with all the shit while I ran away. That’s not cool. I want to be there for you and I’m sorry that I just left.”

Regina took a step towards Emma.

“I don’t appreciate being left alone, but I’d rather you leave than say something you’ll regret.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

Emma gave her a small smile before leaning forward to peck her on the lips. She was working on her impulse control, but after a lifetime of having none, it was a tough thing to develop.

“Can someone please tell me what the hell is going on here?”

Startled by both her mother’s enraged voice and use of profanity, Emma pulled away and faced her. She decided to try explaining herself. Regina had been encouraging her to try and express how she felt, rather than react impulsively as she was used to doing. It had been trying at first but Regina had been surprisingly patient. She had been slowly helping Emma calm down and express herself, and while it was a working progress, Emma was doing better now that Regina had been helping her.   

“I’m sorry," Emma said calmly, taking a deep breath as she continued. "I shouldn’t have reacted as badly as I did, but when you mention him I get really angry and upset and I can’t help myself. I hate him, Mary Margaret, and nothing you say will make me think any differently. I don’t want you to talk to me about him anymore. I don’t want to hear anything about him. And if you name my new sibling after him, I don’t think I will be able to see you anymore. I can’t stand to hear that name and I won’t be able to look at the baby knowing who he was named after. I've told you this repeatedly, but it's like you're not hearing me. So, let me make this perfectly clear.”

Emma took a step forward and stared her mother right in the eyes.

“If you name your kid after that man, you're no longer welcome in this house or in my life. I'm not gonna stand by silently and pretend like this is okay. Maybe that’s how you guys did it in the old world or whatever, but this is not that place and I won’t stay quiet about something this fucked up. I loathe that name, that man, and everything that he was.”  

Emma looked to her girlfriend, who reached out her hand and squeezed it. Mary Margaret watched as the two communicated silently, unable to decipher the silent conversation. She was still no closer to understanding what the hell was going on and she was both angry and frustrated at this entire ordeal. Her father was a good man, and it made her furious to think that Regina had poisoned her daughter’s mind against him. He had been nothing but loving and kind, and damn it, they were going to talk about this.

“I want to know what’s going on.”

Regina sighed heavily. She had been angry for a very long time. She had hated everyone for so long, it had felt like she would never be able to feel anything else. She never thought she would ever be able to love anyone, but then Henry had come into her life and her anger had slowly started to dissipate. She was able to feel something other than hatred for the first time in decades. He had melted much of her anger and hatred, and he reminded her that she was capable of love.

And Emma, her sweet Emma, who was such an idiot but whom she loved with everything she had. Emma had taught her how to laugh again, how to be happy. After a lifetime of pain, hurt, and betrayal, Emma and Henry had shown her how to be happy again. At one time, there would have been no question about Regina opening up to Snow White. She simply never would have, regardless of the circumstances. But, things were different now. The two had come to a sort of… understanding. A place of neutral ground, where there were no feelings of friendship but there was no hostility either. Regina was not angry anymore. In fact, she had been happy. She and Emma, together with their son, had formed a family, a unit. For the first time, she had been happy and she had a family. Emma, who had been so lost and alone, had also found a home and happiness. But then Mary Margaret announced her pregnancy and the name she had chosen, and everything had changed. Every time Emma spoke to her mother now, it ended in an argument. Their dinner tonight was the first time she and Emma had spoken in nearly two weeks, but it ended just as every discussion had been ending lately: a huge fight after Mary Margaret refused to budge on the baby name.

Emma hadn’t been happy for two months now, and as a result, neither had she. Regina had finally found someone she loved completely, someone who loved her just as fiercely in return, and she would do anything to make her happy. She had been selfish, knowing what she needed to do and not doing it. But as Regina looked at Emma now, seeing how upset she was yet again, she knew she couldn’t keep quiet any longer. She needed to talk to Mary Margaret, because if she didn’t, Emma would lose the relationship she had with the mother she had only just found. Regina would not allow that to happen.

“Regina,” Mary Margaret called to the woman.

“Hey,” Emma said softly, pulling Regina aside. “We don’t have to say anything.”

“I think we do.”

“We don’t. We don’t have to do anything.”

Regina bit her lip.

“Part of me really does not want to talk to her.”

“Okay,” Emma nodded. “Then we won’t.”

Regina shook her head, disagreeing.

“We need to. I simply would prefer not to.”

Regina glanced over to Emma’s mother. She did not want to speak in front of her. Emma, sensing this, asked Mary Margaret to leave for a minute. The woman reluctantly agreed, repeating that she wanted to know what was going on.

“Okay, baby. What is it? What’s wrong?”

Regina took a deep breath. She despised admitting her doubts, her weaknesses. They made her feel vulnerable, a position in which she had promised herself long ago that she would never again find herself. She loathed being vulnerable, feeling unsafe, but this was Emma, she reminded herself. Emma loved her. _Emma will not hurt you_.  

“I need to do this, for us. Because if I don’t, I will feel forever that I could have prevented the rift that will undoubtedly take place between the two of you if we do not have this conversation. However, I have many reservations. I can understand that your mother will be shocked, but so help me Emma, if she defends what he did-”

“I’ll lose it, Regina. I swear to God, if she defends that bastard’s actions, I will throw her out of this house before she can even finish her God damn sentence.”

“She owes me nothing, Emma. Her loyalty has always lain with her father and she very well may react that way now, out of shock or simply because a part of her still despises me for everything I’ve done. She may take his side and defend him. I’d like to say that I won’t care, because heaven knows your mother’s opinion means nothing to me. However, hearing someone, even someone like her, defend what he did to me… I’m not sure I can handle that, Emma.”

“I know, baby.”

Emma pulled her into her arms, rubbing her back soothingly. Regina very rarely allowed herself to show her vulnerability and even when she felt it creeping in, she fought it with every fibre of her being. But the one subject that would reduce her to an insecure mess (other than her mother) was Leopold. She was still greatly affected by his actions, despite the fact that it happened nearly half a century ago. Emma knew how deeply the wounds ran. She had been present for the aftermath of many a nightmare. She had been present, seen the terror, the excruciating pain and turmoil Regina relived every time she was plagued with a nightmare or a flashback. Emma had hated the man before, but after seeing the devastating results of his cruelty on Regina, she did not have words strong enough to describe how she felt about him now.

A knocking sound pulled both women’s attention towards to the doorway. David stood there, smiling tentatively.

“Mary Margaret told me you three have some things to discuss. I’m going to take the boys to the apartment for the night so you can talk if that’s alright.”

Emma smiled gratefully.

“Thank you.”

He nodded.

“Thanks for dinner, Regina.”

“You’re welcome. Have a good evening, David.”

Henry popped in a few minutes later.

“Moms? Are you going to be okay?”

“Yes, Henry.”

“Is everything okay?” He asked, eyeing his adoptive mother worriedly. “You seem really upset.”

“There’s a difficult subject we must discuss, but it’s nothing for you to worry about.”

He bit his lip in concern.

“Remember when I told you it is better to discuss things, even though it can be very difficult to?”

“Yes.”

“This is one of those times. We need to have a serious discussion, but it is a difficult subject for me. I’ll be okay though, honey. You mother is here to ensure that.”

He looked to his other mother.

“You’ll take care of her?”

“You know I will, kid. I always do.”

He nodded.

“Yeah, you do. Okay.” He then turned to Regina. “You can do it, mom. You’re really brave.”

Regina smiled, genuinely touched at his words. He was growing into such a sweet young man.

“Thank you, Henry. Now, behave for your grandfather, okay?”

“I will. Goodnight, moms.”

“Goodnight, Henry,” they said in unison, each taking a turn to give him and hug and kiss goodbye.

When the house was empty, save for the three women, Regina gave a heavy sigh. Mary Margaret had joined them as soon as the men left, and the three were currently stood in the dining room.

“Should I make tea?” Emma asked. Not that she wanted tea, but she didn’t really know what to do or say.

“No, thank you, dear. Perhaps you could get us some water and we can move to the office?”

“Sure thing.”

Regina gave a tight smile before leading the way. She took a seat on the couch and indicated that Mary Margaret should sit in the overstuffed chair across from her. When Emma joined them a few minutes later with glasses of water, Regina began to feel nervous. Not that she let it show of course, but her stomach was in knots and she hated feeling this way. She was dreading this conversation.

“Are you finally going to tell me what’s going on?” Mary Margaret asked.

Regina looked to Emma, who gave her an encouraging smile. She turned back to Mary Margaret and finally spoke.

“There are things I have kept from you, things about your father that you were never told. When you were a child, there was no need to burden your innocent mind with such dark things. Then, as an adult, I spent so much time getting vengeance on everyone, and trying to kill you, that we never spent enough time in the same room for me to tell you, even in spite. When I cast the curse, you had no idea of your past, so your father obviously never came up in conversation. Now that the curse has broken, I know that your memories have returned. However, there are still some things you were never told, things I would prefer not to discuss with you. I had no intention of ever telling you, not only because they are not your business and are immeasurably difficult for me to discuss, but also because it would do no good for you to know. If you had learnt these things, it would have tarnished the image you had of your father, and after everything I had taken from you, the least I could do was allow you to keep an untainted view of him. So I kept quiet. However, my silence is now hurting Emma and that I will not allow. We are going to have this discussion, no matter how apprehensive I feel.”

Mary Margaret took a minute to reflect upon Regina’s words. To say she was surprised that the woman had taken her feelings into account for anything was an understatement. Whatever they were about to discuss, it was going to be heavy, but she was sure she could handle it. Perhaps he had killed a man, or many men. He was a king. He was bound to have his secrets. He probably had a good reason for whatever it was that he did.

Mary Margaret looked between Regina and Emma, trying to decide what to ask first.

“So you've kept secrets, but Emma knows them?”

“Yes, Emma knows.”

“Why?”

“We are in a relationship. She is directly affected by the traumas of my past.”

Mary Margaret gave a nod of acknowledgment, suddenly a little wary. She wasn’t sure what traumas Regina was going to discuss. The truth was, the woman never ever spoke of anything private with her anymore, not since she had made the mistake of betraying her trust once before. Regina did not forgive easily, and she knew she still did not forgive her for that mistake. Knowing that she was going to open up now made Mary Margaret both nervous and incredibly curious.

Regina turned to Emma, her eyes clouded with fear and doubt. Emma reached out and took her hand, running her thumb over her skin soothingly.

“Do you need to me say it?”

“No,” Regina finally said. “I can.”

She turned to Mary Margaret and spoke evenly.

“Your father… you know how dearly he loved your mother,” Regina started, unable to keep some bitterness from seeping into her voice. “He never accepted her death and spoke of her frequently, even while married to me. Your father did not love me, nor did I love him. He barely tolerated my presence. When I was lucky, he ignored me completely. When I was not, he…” Regina trailed off, not wanting to say the words. She stayed quiet for a moment, gathering her thoughts, before resuming her earlier monologue. “He did not respect me. He did not care for me or my needs or my desires. He did not care for my well-being. He took what he wanted, when he wanted it, regardless of how I felt, how I objected, how it hurt me. Nothing deterred him, and I had no choice in the matter. He forced me to do things that were traumatising to say the least, but I was his wife, and it was my duty to _serve him_ as he so wished. I was told what to do, and despite the agony it caused me, I was obligated to go along with his wishes. I was an unwilling participant, but I had no choice.”

“So you weren’t happy in your marriage," Mary Margaret finally responded after several moments of silence. "No offense, Regina, but we all knew that. You were expected to do what he wanted because you were his wife. It was kind of the way of things back then.”

Regina swallowed her anger. She knew Mary Margaret wasn’t understanding what she was saying because she knew Snow White. The woman could only think innocently. She thought she was referring to the fact that she could never choose her clothing, her hair style, her meals, how she was forced to attend events she hated. Regina had been used to not having a choice in such matters. Her mother had never given her a choice in her life. No. She was referring to something far worse, to something she had buried so deep inside that it had nested into her body, into her soul, festering and rotting her from the inside out. _Stupid girl._ Regina held back a cruel taunt about how naïve a woman she was. Instead, she stayed quiet, working through her thoughts.

“It was more than unhappiness, Mary Margaret,” Emma said through clenched teeth. “I’m not even going to touch the whole bullshit about it being an accepted thing that a woman should be unhappy in her marriage, that her _husband_ should make choices for her, just because it was ‘the way things were’. It wasn’t unhappiness. It was way more than that.”

“Then I don’t understand. Is it because he didn’t love you? My father did love my mother very much. I’m sorry he didn’t love you, but he and my mother… they were meant to be. Until your mother killed her.”

“Yes, well. Fate punished me well for that I assure you,” Regina said evenly.

“Because you had to marry my father? It couldn’t have been that awful. Everyone loved him. You must have been happy sometimes."

“I wasn’t happy, you naïve little girl. I was alone, terrified, and I suffered every single day for a decade. It was ‘that bad’ and worse. I had no control over anything in my life. I had no say in anything that happened to me, including what happened to my own body. And I’m not talking about what I could and could not wear.”

“What do you mean then?”

“Really, Mary Margaret?” Emma blurted. “You’re not getting it?”

“Well, you’re telling me that he wasn’t a good husband to you and I’m sorry that he wasn’t but he did do what he thought was right. He made decisions based on the greater good. Sometimes you have to sacrifice the happiness of one for the good of everyone. I’m sure he didn’t mean for you to be so unhappy, but how could have you been happy with him? You didn’t love him. There’s nothing he could have done to make you happy if you didn’t let yourself be happy.”

Regina seethed, but it was Emma who shot up and began pacing the room. She couldn’t even look at her mother as she raged.

“He did not do what he thought was right! He never did what was right when it came to Regina! He didn’t give a rat’s ass about her. He treated her like shit and he violated her worse than- than-” She fumbled here, as she had no frame of reference for how horrifically Regina was assaulted. “He treated her worse than you’d treat a dog, Mary Margaret! ‘There’s nothing he could have done to make you happy if you didn’t let yourself be happy’? How in the Christ was she supposed to be happy while she was living with that monster?! While he was doing those things to her? And she was just supposed to take it because she was his wife? He was a tyrant, and if you think either of us are gonna spend the rest of our lives hearing his fucking name ‘cause you’re too selfish and ignorant to see what’s right in front of you, then you’re delusional. When this conversation is over, you and I are _never_ talking about this again. And I mean _never_. I will not keep having this discussion with you. He was a piece of shit and he is not worth my energy or my time. I am never talking about him _ever. again._ ”

“Emma, don’t speak about him that way. He was a good-”

“Do not continue that sentence! Are you even listening to us, Mary Margaret? Are you even hearing what the hell Regina’s saying?”

“Yes, of course I am-”

“No. I don’t think you are!”

“Emma,” Regina finally spoke up. She was nearly shaking with anger, but she could see how Emma was losing control over herself. She needed to take over this conversation again before her lover lost control completely.

Emma, upon hearing her Regina’s voice, stopped in her tracks. She took a deep breath, realising that she was overtaking the discussion. _This is not your news to tell._ She moved to Regina, sitting next to her.

“I’m sorry,” Emma said softly, gently squeezing Regina's hand in apology.

“You’re letting your emotions control your actions again.”

“Can you blame me? When I think of that bastard…”

“I know.”

Regina squeezed Emma's hand before turning to her former stepdaughter. She really didn’t have a choice. She was going to have to spell it out.

“He _violated_ me, Mary Margaret. Throughout our entire marriage. He used me. He forced himself onto me. Not one of our _relations_ ,” Regina spat the word, “was consensual. Every single time, it was against my will.”

Mary Margaret sat there in silence, disbelief clearly written on her face.

“No. It’s not true. It was… he was your husband.”

“Yes, he was,” she said bitterly. “And he caused me excruciating pain every time he reminded me of that fact.”

Mary Margaret’s hand fluttered to her mouth as she shook her head, tears welling up in her eyes. She didn’t believe it. Her father was a gentle, kind man. He would never.

Regina could see the disbelief in her eyes, so she took a deep breath to give herself courage. She was going to say the word, the one that affected her so.

“He… _raped_ me, Mary Margaret. For ten years, your father… raped me. I have spent years trying to work through the trauma I suffered at his hands, and I have come to a place where I am finally starting to live again.”

Mary Margaret could not speak, so Emma took over, albeit more calmly this time.

“You never went through that because you had my dad. You don’t know what it’s like. Every one of your experiences, including the first ones which are the scariest and most painful, was with someone you loved and who loved you back. You knew what was going on and I’m assuming David was gentle. You weren’t some kid who was sold off to a man three times your age and then forced into something you didn’t understand, with no regard for how much it hurt you. Now imagine that for ten fucking years. You have your memories of him, but ours, this is what they are. They are of this and only this and they will not change. Now tell me, do you really wanna force that kind of history on a kid?”

Mary Margaret let go of the sob she had been holding in, shaking her head.

“No,” she managed to croak out. She wept openly now. “It’s not- it can’t be.”

Emma got up from the couch and moved to her mother’s side. She pulled her into her arms, holding her tight. Despite the fact that she was still angry, her heart clenched at seeing the sheer devastation on her mother's face. As angry as she was, Emma still felt sympathy for her She had just learnt that her father had violated a woman repeatedly for a decade. That would be difficult for anyone to learn, and even more so for someone who loved their father as much as Mary Margaret loved hers.

“I’m sorry you had to find this out. I’m not such an asshole that I don’t recognise that this is overwhelming to you and probably more than you ever wanted to know about him, but you have to understand what this has been like. Every time you bring up his name, it causes horrible thoughts for both of us. If you do that to my brother, if you give him that name, all it’s gonna do is cause a rift in this family. Regina has suffered enough. I’m not going to let her suffer any more, not if I can help it. I know you have suffered too, a lot, but this… this is non-negotiable.”

Emma held her mother, stroking her back as the woman cried. She looked over at Regina, unsure of what to do. Mary Margaret was very emotional and she was not sure how to comfort someone who was like this. She was used to Regina, who had near perfect control over her emotions. The trick with Regina was getting the woman to reveal how she really felt, not try to calm her down from a hysterical breakdown. Emma was at a loss as to how to comfort her mother, so she turned to her girlfriend for help.

Regina sighed and got up. It seemed she would never escape her former stepdaughter’s dramatic tendencies. She shooed Emma, who looked incredibly uncomfortable holding her mother, and took over. Regina suppressed an eye roll when she felt Mary Margaret burrow into her chest. _You are not a child_. She forced herself to think about the fact that despite the fact that she despised the man, little Snow had loved her father and this news was undoubtedly devastating to her. _No surprise there. He worshipped the brat_.  

Regina held the woman while she cried, but not because she wanted to. She knew Emma would want her mother to be comforted, so she did it for her lover. Emma had no idea how to comfort such an emotional person and Regina, well, she had soothed Snow back in the Enchanted Forest more times than she cared to remember.

“I can’t… I can’t believe it,” Mary Margaret hiccoughed. She was incredibly uncomfortable hearing these things about her father. She didn’t want to know. She didn’t want to believe it. He had been such a kind, loving man. He couldn't have done those things.

“I don’t wish to discuss this with you any further, Mary Margaret. You’ve been informed of what I was subjected to and that’s as far as this discussion will ever go. It is your choice now. If you choose to name your child after your father, I will no longer consort with you or your husband. I will not begrudge Emma if she chooses to continue to see you, but I will not. I have worked hard to separate myself from that life, to move on and to become a different person. This, unfortunately, will reverse much of the healing I have done and that is not something that I will allow to happen.”

Emma watched as Regina comforted her mother. It almost looked like she cared for the woman. Her words were harsh, but they were free of any bitterness or anger; she simply spoke matter of factly. Regina stroked Mary Margaret's head as she spoke, allowing the younger woman to tighten her hold on her waist as she did. It amazed Emma how far Regina had come, comforting the woman she had once hated so fiercely and who was now forcing her to reveal her darkest secret. While she no longer hated her, Regina certainly did not like her either. It was a testament to how she had changed that she could put aside her feelings to comfort Mary Margaret as she grieved. If she weren’t so distracted by the conversation at hand, Emma would have recognised that the warmth she felt as she watched Regina was her love for the woman growing tenfold.  

When she finally stopped crying, Mary Margaret stayed quiet. She could not speak. Her soul felt heavy. She felt conflicted, torn in two. She still felt incredibly loyal to her father; the man had loved her unconditionally and had supported her through every difficulty in her life. She couldn’t see him as the man they described. She loved him still. Should she hate him for what he had done? She couldn’t though. She felt guilty, thinking she should feel more upset. Isn’t that the right thing to feel when someone tells you that your father raped them? You should feel angry and guilty, shouldn't you? If it had been anyone else, would she feel worse? She felt awful that this had happened to Regina, that she had suffered as she had, but she could not equate the man Regina described with her father. He had been so loving and gentle with her.

She pulled away from Regina, no longer able to be held by her. She felt guilty for taking comfort in her embrace after such news. It also felt awkward and strange. She felt guilty for still wanting to name her child after her father. Was it selfish to still want to do so? She looked over at Emma, who observed her in silence. She still wanted to name her child Leopold, and she felt resentful that she was being forced to choose between honouring her father’s memory and respecting her daughter’s wishes. She had been so happy that the baby was going to be a boy because she had been saving the name for her future son. But now, now she couldn’t use it, could she? If she did, she’d lose Emma. She couldn’t lose Emma. Not again.

Mary Margaret shook her head. This was too much. She needed to get away. She needed her husband.

“I think I need to go.”

Regina did not protest. Mary Margaret got up from the chair, making her way to the front door. Emma followed her mother out onto the front porch, closing the door behind her.

“I-” Emma started, cutting herself off before she could continue. She was suddenly seized with panic. What if this was the last time she would speak to her mother? What if she went home and she and Charming decided that they would name the baby what they wanted, regardless of what Emma and Regina had said? Mary Margaret and Regina had a terrible history. There was no reason that she would respect her need for an alternate name. And Emma, well, she had given her away already once. She had already pushed Emma out of her life and survived. Maybe it wouldn’t be that hard to do it a second time.

“Emma? What is it?”

She could see the fear on her daughter’s face. She may not have raised her, but she was getting better at reading her, and right now, Emma was scared.

“I- uh, I…” Emma faltered. She could not face her rejection, she couldn’t hear her say it, so she shook her head. “Thanks for staying to talk. I hope David is able to be there for you and the new baby.”

She turned, but before she could open the door, Mary Margaret reached out and grabbed her elbow.

“Wait, Emma.”

As she pulled her daughter to look at her, it suddenly dawned on her what Emma was so scared of.

“Oh, Emma. No.” She sighed heavily. “This… this is something I wish I had never heard. The man you described in there, that is not my father. And this is incredibly overwhelming for me. I don’t know how I’m going to handle this information.”

“I know. I understand.”

“No, you don’t,” Mary Margaret said, taking a step forward and grabbing both of Emma's hands. She pushed aside everything she was feeling, needing to address the dejection she could see on her daughter’s face. “This is too much for me right now, but you need to know one thing. _Nothing_ will be more important than you are. If… if you need me to do this, then I will. I want to use his name. I really want to honour my father, but I... I won’t- I won’t name the baby after my father if it means losing you. We will find another name. You are more important than any of this, Emma. If you tell me that you can’t handle this, then I won’t make you. I’m sorry it had to come to this and that I didn’t listen to you earlier, but you have to understand that he was someone completely different to me. Hearing this… it’s devastating and overwhelming. I almost don’t believe it.”

“I know.”

“Okay,” Mary Margaret searched her daughter’s face, still seeing the doubt and worry in her expression. “Sweet girl,” she said, reaching out and stroking her hair. “I know we don’t have the typical mother-daughter relationship one hopes to have with her daughter. I dreamt of a very different relationship between the two of us, Emma. We were supposed to be inseparable, the best of friends. This distance between us, this doubt that you feel in regards to me and my loyalty to you, it was never supposed to exist. I never wanted this for you or for us.

"I know you harbour a lot of resentment towards your father and I for giving you away. I know you had a horrible childhood because of the decision we made. But you need to know, Emma, I thought it was for the best. I hoped you would grow up in a loving family, but instead, you suffered. And I feel guilty every single day. Every time I look at you, I know that you suffered because of the decision I made. I am your mother and I'm supposed to protect you. I was supposed to do what was best for you, but I didn’t. And the guilt eats at me every single time I think about it. It will, forever. Because, baby girl, I wanted things to be so different for you. You were meant to grow up in a world surrounded by people who loved you, who adored you. You were supposed to grow up wearing extravagant dresses and having more toys than you could ever play with. You were supposed to want for nothing, but instead, you wanted for everything. And I’m sorry, Emma. I am so, so sorry. But you need to know, you were always loved, you were always cherished. Your father and I, we love you very much and we wanted you so, so badly. I rubbed my belly every single day that I was pregnant for you and your father, he read to you every night. We talked to you incessantly, because we were so excited to have you. I know that things are different now; I know that you’re older, but Emma, I still feel that way. I love you so much, and there is _nothing_ that will ever replace the spot that you occupy in my heart, that you have always occupied in my heart. I can’t live without you, Emma. I lost you once, and I am never ever going to lose you again. I don’t need this name. I want it, but I don’t need it. What I need is you, so I choose you, Emma. Your happiness matters more to me than anything else because you are my daughter and I love you. So... we'll name the baby something else, okay?”

Emma did not try to hide the sobs as she listened to her mother speak. How could she when her mother was looking at her like that, speaking to her as though she meant every word that she was saying? Emma had longed to hear these things her entire life and to hear them now, they overwhelmed her.

“I love you, Emma, my baby. And I am so proud of the woman that you have become.”

Mary Margaret wrapped her arms around Emma, crying as she was hugged back just as fiercely.

“I love you, mom.”

Mary Margaret sobbed into her shoulder, elation at hearing the words for the first time instigating yet another round of tears. It was almost devastating how beautiful they were, and she clung to her daughter as they cried together. Years of separation, hurt, and pain came crashing to the surface. They held each other tight, each one unwilling to let go after such a heartfelt confession.

Emma, who was used to hiding her emotions, felt incredibly drained by the time her mother finally left. She felt weak, tired, but she was happy. Her cheeks were still warm from where her mother had kissed them, and her body ached (in a good way) from the way she had been held so tightly. Emma finally re- entered the house, locking the door before seeking Regina out. She was still in the office, curled up on the couch.

“Emma,” Regina said with concern upon seeing her lover. She immediately got up and made her way to her, cupping her cheek.

“Hey,” Emma responded, her voice gravelly. “I’m okay.”

“What happened?”

Regina feared the worst, that Mary Margaret had chosen to dismiss her daughter’s wishes in favour of her own selfish desires. It would be just like her to think only of herself. It therefore came as a great surprise to hear the next words out of Emma’s mouth.

“She’s not gonna name the baby after her dad. She’s gonna choose another name.”

Regina blinked, stunned.

“I know,” Emma said, a small chuckle escaping. “I was kinda surprised too.”

“Then why were you crying?”

Emma smiled, her heart filling with warmth.

“She said a lot of really nice stuff.”

“Like?”

“Like that she's gonna choose me over the name and that my happiness mattered to her. She said she loved me and-and that she was proud of me. She told me she was sorry, that she felt guilty for everything that happened. And she told me about my dad reading to me every night when she was pregnant for me. It was…it was nice. To hear all that stuff.”

So Mary Margaret had finally learnt what it meant to be a mother. Regina smiled at her lover, her eyes sparkling with joy. She knew what that had to have meant to Emma, so she did not hide her pleasure at hearing that Mary Margaret had finally said to her daughter what Emma so desperately needed to hear.

“It felt really nice,” Emma confessed.

“She loves you very much, dear. She always wanted to be a mother, ever since she was a child. I’ve no doubt that had I not forced her hand, she would have been an excellent mother to you. You would have wanted for nothing.”

Emma could hear the guilt in Regina’s voice, so she shook her head.

“Don’t, Regina. You didn’t force her to do anything. She made her choices.”

“I didn’t give her much of one.”

Emma leaned forward and kissed her softly.

“Let the past stay in the past, okay?” she murmured against her lips. “Let’s not talk about that.”

“Okay.”

“How are you doing after that conversation? Are you okay?”

Regina gave a small nod.

“I will admit I would have preferred not to have it and I do not look forward to the conversations that may come of it, but yes. I’m alright.”

Emma hooked her arm around the back of Regina’s shoulders and led her upstairs to the bedroom. After changing into their pyjamas, Emma pulled the smaller woman into her arms, cuddling her close.

“Thank you for supporting me today,” Regina said quietly. It was still strange to have someone who fought for her and defended her. She was so used to being alone and not having anyone on her side. It was nice to have an ally.

Emma kissed the top of her head.

“I love you, Regina. I will always support you.”

“I would never want you to feel like you had to choose between your mother and I. As much as she irritates me, she is still your mother and I would never put you in that kind of position.”

“I know you wouldn’t.”

“I worry that’s what I did today.”

“You didn’t, Regina. She did. She made me choose, and I chose you. I will always choose you, unless you’re the one who is in the wrong.”

“I’m never wrong, dear.”

Emma rolled her eyes, a smile on her lips.

“Of course you’re not,” she said sarcastically.

Regina didn’t say anything, so Emma rubbed her arm gently before gently prodding her again.

“You’re sure you’re okay?”

“I’ll survive.”

“I know you will. You always do. Do you want to talk about it though?”

“You’ve done enough for me, Emma.”

“No,” Emma said, shuffling down so that she was facing the other woman. “There is no limit to my love and my support, Regina. There is no “enough”. I am here for anything and everything you need and at no point should you stop opening up to me because you think I’ve “done enough”.  I love you, baby. And I want to know how you’re doing, how you’re feeling. When you’re not okay, I’m not okay. So, please. Tell me. How are you doing? Please tell me the truth.”

Regina bit her bottom lip. She refused to cry. She had been entirely too emotional today. She held Emma’s gaze though, fighting against the urge to hide, to bury how she felt. It was immensely difficult for her to voice her feelings, and she was still learning to communicate her needs. The truth was, she felt scared, needy, and she was struggling with the memories that were flooding her mind.

“I’m… I’m worried, Emma. I hate that I’ve had to expose a part of my past that I have guarded for so long. I’m concerned that your mother will speak to everyone about what I went through and I know everyone will think that I deserved it for all of the pain I inflicted on them. And part of me agrees with them.”

“ _No one_ deserves what you went through, no matter what the hell they did. You did those things, you became that person, because of what others did to you. You have always said that evil is created, it’s not born. Everyone sat back and let you suffer; no one did a God damn thing. So they can forgive me if I don’t sympathise with them in that regard. As for my mother telling others, I honestly doubt it. She says everyone loved her dad and that he was “such a nice man”. She isn’t gonna want everyone to know that he did those things to you.”

“They wouldn’t care that he did, Emma. They would be glad that I suffered as I did.”

Emma took a deep breath, pushing aside her irritation with the way everyone in this damn town treated their mayor.

“To save the argument, we’ll say I agree with you that everyone will be happy you suffered. Even if they did think that, Mary Margaret still wouldn’t want people thinking he could abuse someone in that way, because it would tarnish his reputation, at least a little. Especially when they find out you were 18. Jesus, you were just a kid. But she’s not going to say anything, honey. She doesn’t want people to know.”

Regina worried her lower lip. She didn’t believe it.

“How about I talk to her about it?” Emma asked, when she realised Regina was still concerned.

“No, Emma-”

“I’m not gonna say it’s for you or that you’re the reason I’m talking to her. I’ll tell her it’s for me. It is anyway. I don’t want people knowing our business. This is between us. I don’t air my shit out for everyone to smell.”

Regina snorted despite herself. Emma could be absolutely ridiculous and incredibly crude when she wanted to be. But, the comment did its job. Regina smiled.

“Alright. Thank you, dear.”

“You’re welcome, baby.”

“You’ve been calling me that all night. You know I prefer not to be infantilised.”

“Yeah, but I’m saying it to show that you’re my baby. My love. My boo. My bae. My-”

“Enough, Miss Swan. You’ll stop now if you wish to continue this relationship.”

Emma grinned at her before leaning forward and kissing her firmly on the lips.

“I love you, Regina Mills. You mean everything to me, you know that don’t you?”

“Yes, Emma. I do. Thank you.”

“Good.”

Emma returned to laying her back, pulling Regina into her arms once again. She then tugged the blanket over their bodies and pressed a soft kiss to Regina’s temple.

“I think you might have nightmares tonight, or some pretty bad dreams at least. I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m sorry that you’re once again going to suffer because of someone else’s careless disregard for your feelings.”

“That was almost eloquent, Miss Swan.”

“Regina,” she said reproachfully.

Regina sighed.

“I’m sorry. I don’t…I don’t like feeling this way.”

“I know you don’t, but I’m on your side. I’m here for you, so don’t push me away, okay?”

Regina stayed quiet for so long, Emma assumed she was not going to address what she had said. It therefore came as a surprise when the woman finally did respond.

“I believe you’re correct. I’m… sure that I will have unpleasant dreams. I’m not looking forward to them. I find I’m also having a difficult time suppressing memories of my time with him.”

“Is there anything I can do?”

“I don’t believe so, but thank you.”

“I’m going to be here all night, Regina, and I’m not going to let you go unless you want me to, okay? You’re not alone in this.”

Regina nodded against her chest.

“Thank you.”

Emma kissed her head, troubled at the mention of Regina’s memories plaguing her. She wasn’t sure what she could do, but she knew if they stayed quiet, Regina’s memories would continue to haunt her. She could distract her though. The woman had once admitted that she found Emma’s clumsiness and idiocy entertaining, if not a little endearing. Maybe she could tell her about the stupid things she had done to distract her.

“Did I ever tell you about the time I decided to make a grilled cheese with a toaster and a fork?”

“No,” she said, appalled. “Why would you ever attempt such a thing?”

“Well, I was seven. And I wasn’t allowed to use the stove, so I figured all a grilled cheese is is melted cheese and warm bread, right? So I toasted the bread and then when they popped, I took them out, grabbed a fork since I wasn’t allowed to touch knives, buttered the outside of the bread with the fork and slapped a piece of cheese in between.”

“It sounds disgusting.”

Emma laughed into her hair.

“It was so disgusting. There were chunks of butter on the outside of the bread so my hands got all greasy, the bread was crunchy instead of soft and the cheese didn’t melt. It was so bad. But not as bad as the time I tried to make baked mac ‘n cheese without cooking the noodles first.”

“You threw raw macaroni in the oven with cheese and expected it to magically turn into something edible?”

Emma laughed again.

“I know. I wasn’t a smart kid. I wasn’t really a smart adult either. I tried to make cookies twice as fast by doubling up the temperature in the oven. Burnt the hell out of my cookies.”

“Why would you bake them? Everyone knows the best way to eat cookies is when they are raw.”

Emma gasped dramatically.

“Regina Mills, you do not eat raw cookie dough.” When she was met with silence, Emma continued. “Do you not know you can get _salmonella_ from raw cookie dough? The label clearly states in bolt letters _do not eat raw cookie dough._ And do you know how unhealthy that is, miss M- ah!”

Emma was startled by a warm body suddenly jumping up and straddling her hips, pinning her hands next to her head.

“Do you ever stop talking?” Regina asked, feigning exasperation.

“Not really.”

“I’ve noticed. What can I do to keep you quiet?”

“Eh. You can give me chocolate or a nice bacon double cheeseburger or some chips or-”

“So basically I need to keep your mouth occupied?”

“That works yeah-”

Regina leaned forward and crushed her lips to Emma’s, her hands coming up to cradle her face. She smiled into the kiss when she felt soft fingers on her hips, holding her gently. Emma was always so careful with her, treating her as though she were made of porcelain. As independent and as strong as Regina was, she had to admit that it made her feel safe, cherished, that Emma held her so delicately. She'd die a thousand deaths before she _ever_ admitted that though.

When Regina finally pulled away, her lips automatically formed into a smile.

“I know what you were doing with your stories,” she said, looking down lovingly at Emma. “Thank you.”

Emma reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind Regina's ear.

“I just want you to be happy, Regina.”

“I am, Emma. With you, I finally am.”

Emma pulled her down into her arms, cradling her close.

“I love you, Regina Mills. Nothing is going to change that.”

“I love you too, Emma.”

Regina reached over and intertwined their fingers, resting their hands on Emma’s stomach as she cuddled in close. She let herself feel the safety and comfort that the younger woman offered her, her mind at peace for the first time in weeks.

Fin.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to continue and make a bunch of these one shots, from this universe. Let me know if you have any ideas or something you'd like to read. I can't promise anything, but if a suggestion speaks to me, I will definitely use it! Definitely planning more fluff and some smut in the future.


End file.
